nobody here but us chickens

Month: February 2013

Random Wednesday

wm0487I got rid of one meeting but I still have two others.  Two long others.

le sigh

“Why does your vagina have a tail?”

Seems like that should have been in the forecast.

Dalee needs magazines!

There is something sort of satisfying about pulling a sweater completely apart.  I thought it would give me hives, but not at all.

There is something wonky with my teeth today.

Oh that is so much better.

Cake AND pie.

“The weeks tripped by with tremendous haste.” I swear I’ve read that sentence in at least a dozen other books.

I thought it said “Oscars hottest gays.”

When I turn 40 I want all my friends to fly in, bring their families, and spend a long weekend on the Compound shooting, and drinking Scotch, and having the best time ever.  Yep.  That’s what I want.  Start planning.

Anne Hathaway just kind of gets on my nerves.  I really don’t like that girl.

I really did not want to read this book.  I cannot now decide how I feel about it.

I always type abou tit first and then have to correct it.

It’s French-ish.  Abou tit.

Oh.  Maybe I’ve said that before.

Oh my God, you guys! New album out in May from the National!!! I’m so excited!

Seriously, I can’t NOT do two spaces after a period. It’s physically embedded in my brain.

“If you carry a gun, people will call you paranoid. That’s ridiculous. If I have a gun, what in the hell do I have to be paranoid about?” Clint Smith

There was a Law and Order spin off called Trial by Jury??

I want to work at the Horrors College!

repent all your sin

That was one delicious brownie.  I only ate two bites.  I don’t know how I managed to restrain myself.

Arrrrgh!  This weather!!

OK, this is cute.

Honestly, I wish Norman Reedus would just wash his hair.

“All remembrances are assignations of significance”

Morrissey was so under the radar for so many years, and now all of a sudden he’s back, and totally still wearing the crazy pants.  All heterosexual men enjoy killing each other and the Duck Dynasty family are animal serial killers.  Sometimes people should just stick to what they do best.

hee

Sorry.  I’ve always been rubbish at making friends.

Well, my hair looked nice before I stepped out into the snow storm.

OH MY GOD I’M SO SICK OF WINTER STORMS

Honestly, I’m almost afraid to take Friday off.  I’m afraid of what they’ll do to my building if I’m not here to prevent disaster.

I go to these meetings, they give me papers, I throw the papers in the recycle bin.  Stop giving me papers.

There’s a MANUAL???

This this this this this!!!! I love that Sugata Mitra is doing this. He is SO right on.  It’s awesome that he won the TED prize.

Pardon my language here for just a tiny moment, but Dianne Feinstein can fuck right the fuck off.

Boo-urns!

el oh el

I couldn’t finish 100 Years of Solitude.  Sorry.  I used to be a firm believer in finishing every book – just in case!  But then I read that book about that idiot kid who went to Alaska to live off the land and died and it was SO VERY BAD.  And I realized that there is just only so much time to read on this earth, why waste it on something you loathe??

Seriously, that Alaska kid.  Christ.  And the way people elevated him as some sort of great hero of our time.  He wasn’t a hero.  He was a moron who set off into some of the most dangerous territory in the world with zero training, zero preparation, and zero back up plan.  Say what you will about me for saying this, but he pretty much walked right up to death, shook his hand and said, well, let’s hit it.

I wonder if you made your snack out of apple sauce and string cheese … not together, but as two components of the same snack … if they would then somehow be miraculously filling?

“What becomes of our individual consciences?  Why do we not stand up for what we feel? … Very simply, we are programmed to obey authority even against our own consciences.“  And that right there, is why we see all these stories about lemonade stand busts, or not being allowed to serve venison at a homeless shelter, and there is this quiet outrage, Fox News reports on it once or twice, and then everyone settles right back down into complacency.  This is how we have gotten to where we are in this country.  Over-regulated, over-mandated, our civil rights and liberties, our constitutional rights, slowly whittled away.  And what do we do?  We fucking acquiesce.  Everyone says “Come and take them” and “They’ll take my guns from my cold dead hands”, but when Big Brother comes knocking at your door what will you really do? You’ll hand over your armory just like everyone else.  This is who we are.  This is what terrifies me.  This is the agonizing irony of a country that fought so hard and so long to be free.

I probably should have just made a separate post for that eh?

I feel a whole doctoral dissertation coming on or something.

This is the third time in the last year that Milgram’s study has popped up in my readings.

That woman’s pants are very green.

I feel like we should get #hzrt royalties for that app or something.

Oh my.

Why is there a moose in the jungle?

Ooooh!!!  Yes please thank you!!

Get down, Walter!  You are not a human!

Being a hipster must be exhausting.  It just looks like it’s such hard work.

Googly eyes!

I thought it said elusive tools.

I need some replacement pussy willows.

really truly really

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Random Wednesday

wm0637That is too many meetings!  How did this happen?  When did my life become meetings??

The letter “H” always seems impatient to me.  Aych!  Ayyych!  cH cH cH!

I’m sorry, but I do not like that woman.  I just don’t.

Why didn’t anyone tell me that tiny Cadbury Creme Eggs existed???

Wait.  It’s probably a good thing they didn’t …

What the hell is a Harlem Shake?

This is why we can’t have nice things.

I keep telling you to read more Science Fiction.  It’s prophetic.  I’m totally serious.

I need to rip that whole sweater out and just start over.

No ear buds!  Ack!

Remind me to order more brochure paper.  And those two pocket folders.  We need those too.

I don’t want to sit there.

I don’t even know how to pronounce that.

Oooh!  I love word searches!

Don’t chase people with knives.

early days

thesisesisesiesiseses

She speaks in sentence fragments and it is painful to try to follow.

I do not understand people.

Cute! I would totally wear that.

Yes, I am definitely going to rip out that sweater.  And I’m not even going to re-knit it.  I’m going to use the yarn on a different sweater.  So there.

I don’t have a Craftmatic Adjustable Bed either.

And just like that – my mood is foul.

Cupcake!  My students love me, even if no one else does.

Honestly.  Can’t a girl get a day off???

Oh!  Yes please!  Please please please!

I have never heard the term daughterboard before.

a long time ago tomorrow morning

Empty post.

Oh.  I need stamps.  Damn.

I need a surprise in my mail box.  And not the “it’s been blown up by some asshat with firecrackers” kind of surprise either.

It falls outside the matrix!  We need to file a matrix exception request!

I’m almost done with the Night Circus.  Honestly I was half way through before I really started to enjoy it.  I’m not sure why I even kept reading it.  It’s not as brilliant as what I was led to believe.  But it doesn’t suck.  I would recommend it based on the second half.

wicked wicked wicked wicked wicked

I like scalloped potatoes.

I really feel like irony is dead.  I blame the hipsters.

I think I’d enjoy the NRA convention.

I think I’d enjoy a trip to Texas too … I wonder if I can jump on that van when it pulls out of the college parking lot.

Don’t call to solicit my blood, Red Cross.  It’s just creepy.

I’m so tired of so many things.

Stop kicking me when I’m down.

I need to design a knitting pattern for a TARDIS baby blanket.  No, it’s not for me.

Erm.

My arms are toning up nicely, at least.

Perhaps I need to be clearer.

COMMUNICATE

Pajamas!

It’s the Queen’s tea, you see.

Two stamps.  Exactly what I need.  For now …

Argh!  I’m almost out of my tea!  Buy somethin’ from my store, kind stranger, so’s I can order more.

Now is the time on Sprockets when we remove the red buttons from the sweater we will soon unravel.

Now is the time on Sprockets when we realize that this room is really not terribly well lit.

I don’t know how

I am so ready for spring.

it’s a really fancy card and i like peacocks

Maybe some honey would have been good.

My eyes are crossing.

She loved more than you knew.

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happy birthday, Miss W

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My little punkin belly is 9!  *sniff* Before her party she said “I hope I don’t get many gifts, I already have so much!”  It kills me how grown up she’s becoming.  She had a great party with her friends, where she didn’t get too much stuff, and then we piled all the kids in the Jeeps to go see Escape From Planet Earth (which was not as painful as anticipated, but the Mister did doze off.  At least he didn’t snore).  She opened presents from the Mister and me separately, and got exactly what she wanted (a Smash Book – it’s like scrapbooking for the punk rock art student in you).  It’s been a pretty wonderful weekend on the Compound.

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Random Wednesday

wm0632Minus one meeting.  Plus one meeting.  I think I’m taking a loss here.

I did manage to get off of TWO committees though, so I got that goin’ for me.

I’ve been sleeping like the dead.  I never sleep like the dead.

Oooh, minus both meetings!  Yay me!

So many chairs, so low to the ground.

No, really, it was entirely operator error.  You can disagree all you like.

This is pretty much 100% true of me.

Jelly has no business in a donut.

Deliberately tying your hair in knots is surprisingly difficult.

I can’t shoot with this ammo shortage.

If I was still Catholic, I’d give up carbs for Lent.  Which would be really hard for me.  Because I fucking love carbs.

I pretty much just really hate running.

Someone needs to start a line to compete with Gun Tote’n Mamas, because their concealed carry bags are not attractive.  I cannot find the right bag to save my life.

I should knit something like this.  Someday.  When I can afford to buy yarn again.

I really don’t like Jason Schwartzman’s hair.  On his head, on his face, anywhere.  It actually repels me.

I’m not even a tiny bit Polish.

There’s that word again.

15 years.

I like that Kate Upton isn’t a twig.  She looks fantastic.  But also her girls are enormous on the new SI cover.

I love apple sauce.  It’s not terribly filling.  I’m quite sure I’ve mentioned that.

… step lively and move with purpose …

Outlander Kitchen is killing me with the gorgeous pix of Scotland.  I need to go there someday.  I do I do.

I suspect I’ll see fewer men in kilts than I saw in Seattle.  There are a shocking number of men in kilts in Seattle.

I’m starting to hate furniture.

wheeeeeeeee

I realize it’s not the best Big Star song in the catalog, but I think it’s my favorite.  Like my own personal theme song or something.  Anyway.  I’ve needed it this week.

Stop ruining Wednesdays for me!

Meanhead.

Workin’ on a hat design.  A super cute hat design.  You’re all going to want one.

It’s the ears, you see.  The ears are the problem.

Oh!  It’s Ash Wednesday!

Oh Dear Lord.  Dream Weaver?  Really?

I could go to sleep right now.

Also I could use some Maxalt or something right now.  That would be nice.  And I can’t go home early.

ruinous and true

I’d like to get a new tattoo.

Write a six word memoir.  Write a six word epitaph.  Tell a complete story in six words.  Tell me six things about yourself, but make one of them a lie.

This is wonderful.  I saw this a year or so ago.  I had completely forgotten about it.  Thanks, Mister.

Oh oh oh!  New Civil Wars!  Must own!

Don’t try to play the semantics game with me, pal.

It’s time to admit the truth.  I don’t love Diet Coke any more.

Try not to swallow your tongue on the shock, I hadn’t even had one in 3 months.  And when I attempted to drink one Monday I couldn’t even get half way through the bottle.

Weird.  I just now saw this.  But that’s fully leaded Coke.

Hey!  People who send ridiculous cards and things in the mail like to GET things in the mail.  Just throwin’ that out there.  You can do what you want with it.

I just saw this picture of Ethan Hawke and thought it was Ben Stiller. Or that guy.  From that band.  What is that band?  Mark McGrath?  Regardless.  Not attractive at all.

Also I hate it when people do the “shooter” hands.  It’s so obnoxious.  And just dumb.

I don’t know if beauty is the word I’d use, but definitely captivating.

I keep seeing “want ads” for local friends.  Interesting.  No one is serious, but they’re totally serious.  I suspect I wouldn’t get any takers for mine.

I’m telling you, these new chairs are designed so that you are perpetually slipping out of them.  There’s a weird and uncomfortable angle there.  I might have to switch back.

I just want to finish this book.  And this hat.  And not have a hurty head.

Sheesh.  iPads charge incredibly slowly.

maybe.  maybe maybe maybe

So this is a thing, I guess.

Scooby is pissed at winter.

This made me cry.  You’ll love it.

Thin Mints!!!

Oh my God!!!  The Jennerator found me the perfect tinted lip balm to replace my discontinued Burt’s Bees’ nutmeg lip shimmer!

If someone wants to get me a new copy of Outlander since mine went walk-about, that’d be really cool.

Also, pastasaurus is a really good back scratcher.

I really liked Anthony Michael Hall on the Dead Zone.  I wonder what he’s up to these days.  Not enough to Google it though.

That’s quite enough out of you, young lady!  Quite enough, indeed.

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breakfast guest

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Not the best photo, technically speaking, but whatever.  We were finishing breakfast Sunday morning, and this little sweetie wandered out of the woods and right up to the house.  So I shot through the dining room window.  It was very cool.  My plants are tasty.

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walter

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walter has changed so much since he came to stay with us.  he’s fat now.  and he lets us pet him and scratch his head.  he “fist bumps” us with his skull.  he thinks the porch belongs to him.  he also thinks he should be allowed in the house with the dog.  as soon as spring arrives and the ground thaws, we’re going to have to build him a pen.  but we’ll get him another goat to keep him company.

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meandering

wmIMG_0598I woke this morning from a dream – a very odd dream involving Johnny Depp, a library slash record store, Duran Duran, and my best selling collection of 9 essays entitled “Daniel Hannan Gets Me Hot, and Other True Tales,” (which does not actually exist, though it’s interesting that that post was made almost exactly a year ago), and sat down at my dilapidated laptop to write about that.  However, the other side of my brain had different plans, and hijacked my post.

I started thinking about blogs, and how I often find myself following links from one blog to another to another and not very far down this rabbit hole of blogging mommas it’ll all turn into a huge hippie love fest of organic foods, crystal children, Obama fantaticism, self congratulatory while pretending to self effacement progressive parenting soap boxing.

Who names their kid Che, anyway?  I mean, aside from the implications of forever associating your child with the man who was responsible for the deaths of thousands of people, it literally means “Hey!”  That’s kind of a dumb thing to name your kid.  Hippie.

On the flip side you have the ultra cons – these are much fewer and farther between – who are chock full of jesus, moral outrage, and values god dammit!

I need the in between blogs with small l libertarian mommas who do the best they can and just want the man, the progs, and the uber cons, to chill the fuck out and leave us alone.  With lots of photographs, because I’m always looking for inspiration in others’ work.

Are you out there, small l libertarian mommas with blogs?  Let’s have a scotch and hang out while the kids play with power tools, ride their bikes without helmets, and roam the back 40 unsupervised til dinner.  I’ll tell you about that dream.

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Random Wednesday

wm0628I’m starting to miss summer.

You need a second job for your juice habit!

If I had another baby girl I’d name her Andromeda.

That’s probably a lie.

I wonder why Toddzilla doesn’t have a FB fan page?

This library book doesn’t have a due date stamped in it anywhere.  How the hell am I supposed to know when to return it?

What kind of madcap library are they running in Portage??

I ♥ our normal library.

Oh my God!

“No weapons real or imaginary???  That school SUCKS!”

Call me a gun nut all you want.  Who are you going to come running to when the Zombie Appocalypse happens?  That’s right.  And I’m going to laugh my evil laugh and slam my door in your face.

I don’t know.  The Following seems to be headed down the same path as The Killing.  It’s all designed around a very specific case and when that case ends there is no where else to go.

Also, holy gruesome, Batman!!

Some beautiful.

Yeah, I’m not sure I can forget it’s tongue.

I’m considering taking up cross stitch.  Because I don’t have enought to do already.

I don’t understand what you’re saying.

I think it’s ridiculous that wiper blades do not come in a package of two.  I realize that if you have a rear wiper you may only need one, so fine, offer some in single serving packages.  But also package them in twos and offer a discount.

Sometimes I wish I was the kind of person who could call in to work for a “mental health day” or something.  I have a ridiculous amount of sick time accumulated.

Oooh!

It drives me batty when you continuously fail to close the drawers in the filing cabinets all the way.

Shut up, I’m not Monk.

Epexegesis might have to be my new favorite exclamation.  Like ‘Jesus!’ with extra oomph.

Knitting is exercise!

“These strikes are legal, they are ethical and they are wise,” Carney said.  It bears repeating, because that statement should terrify you.

I’ve mentioned that I adore Bruce Willis, yes?

Shutter fatigue??

omg donut!

Going back to normal print after reading that large print book is going to be weird.

I probably need a patron saint of some kind.

Yay!  It’s time to move furniture!  My favorite!

That was also probably a lie.

Weird, sudden, intermittent, stabbing pain in my left temple.  It’s probably a tumor.

Apparently I can’t knit cables and read at the same time.

committee committed committing committedness commituity

I need to get off this committee.

A little flexibility would not kill you.  Really.

Oh my God you guys!!!  I love Bridget Jones.  I have literally laughed out loud reading those books.

Chris Rock is still around?

This is kind of hilarious.

266 days to Halloween!

I’d really love some Papa John’s pizza right now.

I guess I’ll bake some chicken instead.

woo hoo

bear x-ings next 5 miles

I wonder what that must have been like.

Really, short of starving myself …

Books.  Everywhere.

The word ‘haphazard’ always sounds sort of breathless to me.

Religions are entirely too complicated.

I’m sorry.  I’ve had kind of a bad day.

I’ll send you a card too.  I’m not stingy.  But you might not get it on a Saturday.

Maybe I should start a snail mailing list.

My dad could totally kick Obama’s arse.  But he wouldn’t even bother.

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“This is the greatest day of my life!”

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The perfect birthday gift for my favorite almost 9 year old?  A writing workshop with her favorite author of all time, Johnathan Rand.  She met him at a book signing two years ago at this same indie book store in town, but this was an afternoon of epic epicness, as she says.  She was so thrilled.

And Johnathan Rand is the nicest guy.  I chatted with him for a bit before the workshop.  He’s from northern lower MI, so of course we compared snow falls.

Miss W got to be his assistant for a few activities, which she loved.  At one point he gave them a paragraph and told them to continue the story.  He had a couple people read theirs aloud.  When he heard Miss W’s he had her stand up and read it again so the whole place could hear it, he liked it so much.  He thought it was a fantastic example of writing a complete story in just a few sentences.  I told her they sometimes call that “sudden fiction” or “minute fiction”.

At the end he gave them all signed posters and a book of American Chillers Word Searches.  Miss W got her favorite book, Dangerous Dolls of Delaware, signed, along with a couple of other things.

Not bad for a snowy Sunday afternoon.

wm5047Dangerous Dolls of Delaware

wm5049Rand chatting with Miss W before they got started. She made him laugh a few times.

wm5056Book Bug art

wm5061Waiting in line to get more things signed.

wm5063 wm5065That’s pretty much complete happiness right there, people.

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