Well. That played out pretty much exactly like I thought it would.

The only reason people think you shouldn’t eat cats and dogs is because they’re cute. They never think about the fact that cats and dogs have no qualms about eating humans.

I need a t shirt that says “I <3 Gridlock”.

That doesn’t come up as a heart graphic. Lame.

When did they start calling Frito Pies Walking Tacos??

Damn. My whole day is just gone. Just like that. Poof.

“Warning! You must have your solar system up and running by midnight on December 31st!!” It sounds more like a line from Doctor Who than a commercial I heard on the radio on my way to work.

“… less definition than a spelling bee for illiterates.” Ha! Thanks for that.

I think the real question here is WHY you have a subscription to People magazine.

I dunno. If I were trying to get you to buy my Craftsy class, I would probably *not* refer to myself as “beloved knitwear designer”. That seems a teensy bit egotistical and presumptuous.

what’s that, can’t hear you, arms are trees

Wow. That Stitch Fix stuff is expensive. That is not a frugal subscription service at all.

Huh. She has very long teeth.

I really kind of love this wallet. And also I really want this hoodie. A lot.

I am so done helping you, you jackass. I am not the tiniest bit inclined to help you.

Twix ghosts are not delicious at all.

Another phrase that needs to die in the work setting: “I’ll punt that to …” Stop punting. You don’t even like football.

I really need to think of this place as a transition. A painful, painful transition.

WTF. What happened to you not speaking to me? Can we go back to that? That didn’t last nearly long enough.

I need a snack.

I’M OUT OF PEANUT BUTTER M&M’S! I’M OUT OF PEANUT BUTTER M&M’S!

HA! I didn’t even think about the filibuster. That’s hilarious.

I looooooove these. Especially Cocoon. And I love the honesty of these, particularly that in the text, they’re so beautiful. Click through to the photographers’ websites.

My eyes are all bleeeearry.

Yeah, I’m just wingin’ it here.

I need to figure out what the hell I’m going to wear tomorrow. I need someone to just lay out 5 days worth of outfits for me. I’m not even joking.

This Macbook won’t let me hold a letter down to repeat it. Arrrrrrrrrrgh.

Argh.