Well I’m not just going to not say anything.

HA! He looks like he’s saying “Wait WHAT? You’re taking my picture???”

When you say someone shoots film, you don’t actually have to add the word analog. Just. It’s kind of implied.

Another day, another paper jam.

I think it’s time to re-read The Time Traveler’s Wife.

Well. Now I clearly need to watch Death Wish.

It just means they like to make shit.

My feet are hot. I hate it when my feet are hot.

Stop mixing politics into knitting.

GOD. I never want to hear the phrase “Nevertheless she persisted” again. Fucking staaaaaaaaaaahp.

Yeah. Just stay the hell off the damn bridge when it’s windy. Especially if you’re driving a semi.

Dear Staples, I pretty much never need you to email me to tell me that items in my order have been delivered. I’m actually looking at them right now. Thanks.

Wow. His dad was a cop. Damn.

Ooooooooooops. I totally misread that whole thing. Fffuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu

The mashed potatoes always somehow ended up leaching onto the brownie. The Salisbury steak was my favorite one. I still don’t like mixed vegetables.

“What year was this?”
“The year Canada bought all our Checker cabs and turned ’em into cop cars.”

Man. Riverdale looks like a truly awful show.

regardless of what they say

“key to lock”

Blech. It smells like fake blueberry in here. I hate blueberries. I hate fake fruity smells. Like fruit scented crap. It’s giving me such a headache.

Can I just quit? All of it? Just be done.

this is moderately funny.

I thought that said “he has an affinity for doctors.” It did not.

Man. Y’all are so bossy.

I am not made of money. Not even pennies.

If you refuse to get on FB you can’t complain when information has only been shared with people on FB.

Yep. Though I’m not nearly as bad as I used to be. I also did not realize until surprisingly recently that it is actually anxiety.

Kid, if you say “oh that’s no prob” one more time I am firing you right now.

Now you want me to keep track of crap that hasn’t even been submitted yet? Please.

“Self-engrossed students are acting out little psychodramas of oppression.” I could not have phrased it better. Although I disagree with MacDonald in that I don’t believe it’s racism alone. It’s a whole litany of progressive fantasies. I also think Furedi is wrong about nonjudgmentalism. Even amongst their own ranks.

It’s not like I asked to have Heart stuck in my head. I don’t even like Heart.

Wow. “Gunsplained” That’s a new one.

Well. That discussion went much better than expected.

“Do they have a society of serial killers that meet once a month, and they sit in the diner in the back room, and they say, ‘Where are you dumping the bodies this month?’ … I don’t think we have that.” ~ Suffolk County Police Department Commissioner Richard Dormer

Everyone’s doors are closed. ‘Cept mine. I don’t get a door.

MY KINGDOM FOR A DOOR!

I don’t have a kingdom.

Hey Instagram – I don’t have a fucking cat. Stop advertising cat crap to me. Your algorithms are useless. I don’t even like cats. In fact, I sort of actively dislike cats. Leave me alone.

What does that even mean? Why can’t people just speak clearly? Why does everything need to be bloody translated these days? This is why there is so much division and polarization in the world. One side invented a whole new language that the other side doesn’t speak.

Y’all have overly complicated everything to death.

I should just eat lunch now.

This is bullshit.

I don’t know why I think anyone should start listening to me now.

Yeah, but no. I know a LOT of people I would not want anywhere near a firearm. But still. Funny stuff.

Pringles are delicious.

I’m so glad that

Of all the yarn or fiber festivals in all the world, Edinburgh is the only one I’d really care about attending. Because SCOTLAND.

I should just message Neil directly. On Instagram.

Fine. I’ll go without you.

I’ve been using the word shady a lot lately.

Underhanded also works.

I think, at this point, it’s safe to say I did not get the job.

I’m willing to lay odds that I did not get the other job, either.

I am trapped here. Forever.

Probably.

Have you been drinking, Tiny Fox Mulder?

Supermarket or Grocery Store? (The correct answer is “Meijer.”)

No. No one needs to see the pingbacks but you.

I don’t know how you even slip out of a house surrounded by police and go shopping at WalMart. I mean. Wow. That is some impressive shit.

“Nothing limits the power of the state like the outer boundaries of people’s willingness to do what they’re told.”

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