“There’s been no war and no terraforming event. The environment is stable. It’s the Pax. The G-23 Paxilon Hydrochlorate that we added to the air processors. It was supposed to calm the population, weed out aggression. Well, it works. The people here stopped fighting. And then they stopped everything else. They stopped going to work, they stopped breeding, talking, eating. There’s 30 million people here, and they all just let themselves die.

I didn’t even know Kalamazoo had a Chipotle.

I should not try to join a discussion. I should just continue to lurk.

Still can’t afford Knit Stars.

No one gives a rat’s ass what I think.

He ain’t right.

Oh great. Just great.

Hi-larious. And accurate.

Beasties.

No, but really. Help.

No. Really.

Still don’t actually care about your cat.

This is a really good book.

Huh. I’d never heard of ICU psychosis before. Fascinating.

I shouldn’t be able to smell your perfume in my cubicle.

Well, that’s disappointing.

Shut up. Somebody take me to the theater.

Um, I don’t know if you’re aware of this in your current freakout, but birthright citizenship is protected by the Constitution, and Trump can’t “end it by executive order.”

Honestly, no one is even trying. Y’all are just going to Defcon Whateverthebadoneis immediately instead of taking a breath and doing 5 minutes worth of research. Calm the fuck down.

Well, that’s one way to keep people out of my office.

I don’t know how to do some of that stuff.

I don’t know how to feel about the phrase “living cadavers.”

Why are you so weird?

OMG Ash Wednesday. Brilliant.

No, but really.

WHY are we still printing a campus directory?

You better stop your

This is wonky, yes?

I have no idea what’s going on.

This post rarely works when I’m not in the office.

A step down would be fine if I can keep my pay. I’m worth every penny. I swear.

Well, I didn’t get this done, so I may as well add to it Thursday.

You’re a kind and generous person. But you’re also a jerk. I’m having trouble being around you. Ever.

Thumbs. Up.

I really hate the phrase bougie. And I think you’re an asshole if you use it.

It’s not like

God I need a new job.

Maybe you should take notes.

Shrug

Great. Just great. I will now join the ranks of those with a coffee shop on their way to work. And it’s a Biggby. And Biggby beats Starbucks to death. DAMMIT.

I don’t know what FB thinks “most recent” means but it sure as hell ain’t this shit.

I don’t want to hear your conversation. Maybe close your door. You’re lucky enough to have one.

What did I do now?

I’m too old for this shit.

I do love a fuzzy sweater.

Now, where to hide out til 7:30?

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