“For all of my “friends” that voted their conscience, not their fear: I hope your conscience sleeps well tonight …” Well yes, I slept very well last night. The only time you should be able to sleep well is when your conscience is clear, and mine very much is.

Honestly, it must be so exhausting to be so outraged all the time.

And enough with the fear mongering already. This, despite how much you might like it to be, is not actually the end of the world.

No, really. I promise you: The world is not actually ending right now.

I had no idea today would be so busy. Nutty.

Argh! My notebook got wet and now I want to throw it out and start a new one because the pages dried all wrinkly and they don’t lay flat anymore. ARGH!

Honestly, I should have just gone ahead and run for township clerk. If nothing else, at least I could have gotten our area new and more interesting “I voted” stickers.

I don’t know why it irritates me so much when Canadians pipe up about our elections, but it does.

You can’t trust cute people who say feel good stuff.

We’ll build a wall up north too. An ice wall. It’ll be all Game of Thrones and shit.

Who takes notes with a Sharpie??

I bet I’ma sleep right through that one.

Watching the mass hysteria today has been fascinating and bizarre. Truly fascinating and bizarre.

Gah what is even the point in posting this today? Literally no one cares.

You know what musta happened?

I can’t stop yawning. You guys. I’m so tired.

I wish I could make a cup of tea right now.

Man, fuggit. I’ma take a break and get some knitting done. Finally. Stupid week.

I’m not so sure I even want a woman president, but if I’m going to have one, I want one who isn’t a vile, corrupt, hypocritical, power mad fiend. I would have been embarrassed for my sex had Clinton won the election.

But. But. I don’t even really

I think one of the things that kills me is that there are actually “election counselors” that are being made available to people to help them process their feelings.

I think this post is going to make me very unpopular among some people.

Well. Let’s be honest. This post is going to make me more unpopular.

It’s just a stage name. Come on.

milk milk milk milk milk milk milk milk milk

Yes, that whole pizza is still sitting there.

Alphabecus.

BLTs for dinner? Yes please.

I’m going to stick my head under some really hot water.

Wait. Is it supposed to be cold or spring like tomorrow? This November weather has been so schizophrenic.

Wow. She is unhinged.

I feel like I should have eaten a second BLT. It’s not like we use super thick bread or anything.

Ooh! I should make pumpkin bread this weekend!

Also I should write that bloody paper.

So need a break from all the bloody papers.

I need tea and fioricet. Pretty much now. I’ll settle for fioricet.

Well. Chickens. I don’t know.

Oh damn. I almost forgot to upload a photo. Tell you what. I’ll give you one from the archives.

Oh! It’s dancin’ time.

Except. No.

If you look at me like I’m a crazy person for wearing a costume to work on Halloween, I’d better not see you in a holiday sweater come Christmas.

Also, you’re completely lame and have no joy.

Holy wow! I didn’t listen to the audio, but what an amazing thing.

It’s not looking good for having this out to you before Friday. This week is the very definition of insanity.

and i’m gonna

Oh boy. I hope you’re not getting sick.

Way to go, Bill Weld, you asshat.

Oh look at this lovely sandwich!

Today is not the day for tomatoes.

That entire email from Amazon featured my friend Marko. So neat!

There’s no there there.

I might be considered an adult. In some circles.

cos i’ll miss you when you’re gone

I don’t think you’re going to be able to pull up to the back door. They appear to be planting bushes in the dark.

anarchonistic

Great. Now I’m getting sick. Because I have time for that foolishness.

If you didn’t ask questions yesterday, you have no business asking questions today.

Yeah, I still don’t really get the whole Hamilton thing.

atleastihavetomwaitsworkinforme

As a political scientist, I find the number of my liberal friends who report nightmares about Trump winning the election, which is not an inconsiderable figure, juxtaposed with the number of my conservative friends who appear to have no such (reported) nightmares about a Clinton win, endlessly fascinating. I myself never dream about politics at all. You’re all beautiful humans and you worry too much.

I should have gone into political psychology.

I might be the only human who does not actually care about the Cubs winning.

Why do I always want to add an e to hours?

I don’t wanna be sick. *sob*

I just wanted to

It’s astonishing how much time that whole thing has eaten up. And there’s still more to do. le sigh.

I haven’t done this much typing in years.

That’s how we did used to do things, and no one told me we’d stopped.

I’m pretty sure I’m death right now.

Argh. I dismissed you already.

I hate you, Outlook.

I think I forgot to put deodorant on this morning.

Oh look. A delicious donut.

Holy unprofessional move, Batman. What the actual hell.

Space is limited so act now!

I’m sort of hungry. I guess.

I’m reasonably certain that your tone is entirely out of line.

OK I seriously just hit the wall. I don’t even know what I’m even doing right now. Even.

and i’ll miss you when you’re gone

I’ma hit publish before I go home. You’re welcome.

I wish I had had time to work on that paper this week. Now I’ll have to work on it Sunday. I would rather have done it when it was all fresh.

I typed dresh.

WTF truck. W. T. F.

I have no idea what this even means.

but it’s the only

I’m going to be honest with you. I didn’t even realize it was Wednesday until about half an hour after I got up this morning.

You have got to be effing kidding me. Straight up nuthouse.

I seriously need to just be a stay at home mom. Pretty much now.

I just want sleep. Lots and lots of sleep. Now.

I love this idea. Wouldn’t that be beautiful? I also love the typo transforming cremation into creation.

But what if I think you look really cute today?

dumb

The geekery perpetually smells like wet wool. I’m mostly OK with that.

Yep. Pretty much. Also I’ll keep right on watching them.

You’ll be needing a picture.

I’ll be needing a picture.

The importance of pictures.

All your talk of sustainability is ironic considering the amount of paper you consume on a daily basis.

all wrong, we were

I don’t think that La Croix stuff is particularly tasty at all.

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Yeah I’ve barely touched this. It’s kind of surprising how busy I’ve been today.

God. I’m boring even myself.

I just remembered hamster dance.

do do do da do do doh doh

Had a moment of panic when I thought I missed a meeting. Not that I actually had any desire to attend the meeting at all. But still.

Ha. Gary Johnson robot left me a funny voicemail.

Seems like an odd direction to go, but OK. Sure.

Don’t be sad. I disappoint myself too. We’ll all live.

“Hi, this is Governor Gary Johnson, and this is also a recording. Sorry about that.”

What. No. I am not ready for snow. No no no no no. Nope. Just no.

Well then stop texting me.

I think it’s perfectly reasonable to have a glass of iced coffee right now. Else I might drift off.

Oh wait. Tea actually sounds better. A nice hot cuppa.

And waffles. Tea and waffles. Tea and waffles are a perfectly respectable dinner.

What the hell is going on with my rear facing camera on this phone?

All the flies and ticks are coming inside because it’s getting cold. Evidently they didn’t get the memo that I am refusing to turn the heat on in the house.

Sweet zombie Jesus that’s an ear piercer.

Crap. I have no idea which Halloweeny thing to wear tomorrow.

Nope. Guess the tent was a bad idea. Better put it back in hiding for another 6 months.

What in God’s name are we listening to? Dear Lord.

Hey. Get off the macaroni and cheese.

I almost forgot the picture.

That won’t do at all.

I won’t turn the heat on. I won’t turn the heat on. I won’t turn the heat on. I won’t.

axiomatic

But I wanted to find the hidden vampires.

I don’t know if I am going to be able to watch that particular season of American Horror Story.

I’m going to be needing some migraine drugs.

Gosh I love him. And if I met him, I don’t even know what I’d say except, “Gosh, I just love you. Let’s go take pictures together.”

I don’t understand people who include their email address in their email signature.

OK, I’d like to do this before I die, please and thank you. WOW.

“I don’t even remember that Canadian bobble head guy.”

Yeah, I don’t think “staycation” means what you think it means.

Well, OK, but I’m not an oral surgeon.

It’s too loud in here today. I can’t focus on a damn thing.

How do I still not have the Spock Barbie?

contrarian

Yeah, you don’t have to apologize for that. At all.

Scotch. Scotch would work. Or a hard cider maybe. Yeah.

OMG STOP TALKING!!!

Well. That was not on the agenda for today. Dammit.

Look. I don’t know how you can possibly expect me not to be bitter or resentful. That shit is 100% wrong. There is no other way to see it.

I don’t see any reason for you to be giving me errors every single time I use you, Adobe.

Why does everybody always seem to want to make me do absolutely everything twice?

I should have been an efficiency expert.

I’m rethinking this whole grad school thing. Seriously.

I had no idea David Duchovny was writing novels. Also I’ve been watching him in Aquarius on Netflix and he looks much better than he did in the new X-Files. I’m back to thinking he’s hot. Except that hair cut. That hair cut is not doing him any favors.

Oh good! This must be the part where the new person tells me how to do my job! My favorite!

I’m having border woes. Not that kind. The knitting kind.

Clearly I’m going to be needing this book.

Where does she even get that number?

New plan: Become an oligarch.

OMG STOP TALKING!!!

You’d think I’d’ve written more having had this thing open for two days. Instead I keep fielding curve balls.

Well. Good luck with that.

You know, you could have just said “on all of the entrances.” You should try to be more economical with your words.

I really should have shared a less embarrassing photo of me in that sweater. In retrospect.

Internet problems. Most unexpected.

Fine. I surrender. Whatever.

I have that stupid Thomas the Tank Engine theme stuck in my head.

Do do do do do do doooo doooooooo. Doodleoodledoo. Doodleoodledoo.

Happy Anniversary, Old Man.

So sorry I’ve been taking up so much rent-free space in your brain. You should work on being less bitter. You’ll live longer.

Shit. I’ve got to get this grading done so I can get midterm grades done. Guess I know what I’ll be doing this weekend. Whee.

Grades are dumb.

I thought that said “The Touch of Stan”. It wasn’t Stan.

Trying to figure out how Amazon sorted “Holocaust: A History” into the “Engineering books” category …

Hey guys, please stop polishing one fingernail pink. That’d be great.

Duh. Of *course* Elizabeth. Which other Bennett sister could I possibly be??

This is fun. I saw a couple of vintage Halloween dresses in there I’d LOVE to own.

Ha. I love this shirt.

What?! No one told me season 11 of Supernatural was on Netflix already!!!

I thought “Surely that’s Photoshopped and she didn’t actually say that, because English.” But no. She did. And I lolled and lolled.

Which US president are you? Ronald Reagan. You have a demeanor that some find warm and fatherly. But others find you distant. At times it seems you get by on charm alone. You’re no deep thinker, but you understand that common sense is what matters most.

I think I might be a little offended by the “you’re no deep thinker” part of that description.

But that’s hilarious.

My head is killing me today. I’d been having a pretty good run. I’m kind of bummed right now.

This is starting to be a lot harder than I had expected it to be.

Today has been busier than planned.

Why yes, I will take the spring semester off to teach two sections of my class, thank you very much.

Oh look at this cute little flip book thinger. Hopefully this will ease some of our woe.

I love you, Garden Herb Triscuits.

I see the rain is holding off until it’s time for me to walk to my truck. Thanks so much for that.

#1 a nice safe
#2 gold and/or ammo

Right right right right right. No paycheck there. So. You know. You get what you pay for, I guess.

Wait. Is Mike Rowe living on a boat?

update update update update update update update update update

The only real question now is: The bats or the skeleton tomorrow?

Don’t worry. We’re doing a new anniversary pic. We just didn’t have time to get to it last weekend.

I think bats. Yes. Bats.

Thank YOU.

That does not even make sense.

I can’t believe this is the last Hollows book. I’m so sad.

I’ve always wanted to be Harley Quinn for Halloween. The animated series Harley Quinn. Not Suicide Squad Harley Quinn.

And when I say “always” I mean since 1993ish when the series came out.

Just let me know what we’re doing so I can prepare.

So. Tired.

Two 15 hour days in a row. Messed me up completely.

“Learn English in your native language.” But.

Oh wait. I can see where that might actually be a good idea for some native English speakers, now that I think about it.

Yep. I generally hate the whole world when I’m that pregnant too.

So. I get to do what I want, basically. Sweet.

OK. I’m sitting here staring at Flat Eartha Kitt. I’m cooked.

Every time I try to type waitlisted I type weightlisted. It’s probably Freudian or something.

I don’t know.

Me: “This song was popular when I was in middle school.”
W: “Really? (listens) Yeah. It does sound kind of old.”

I’m procrastinating like it’s my job right now. This is not good.

Awww! I need a little chicken necklace!!

Wait. How do I have no memory of Kurt Cobain with a goatee?

I love a good period drama full of unrequited love.

Bottle flipping is a thing?

Conversation between 2 of the morning guys on the local radio station about Elvis after playing a minute or so of Suspicious Minds:
DJ one: You know, Elvis’ songs like Hound Dog and those things are more popular but I really prefer his older stuff like this one.
DJ two: I have to agree with you, I am really not a big Elvis fan, but I have a real soft spot for his earlier work, like the gospel stuff and Suspicious Minds.
Hound Dog was released in 1957. Suspicious Minds was released in 1969. I guess it’s a good thing it’s a talk radio station.

Damn you Poldark! That was a monstrously awful thing to do. I hate you.

Wait. What?? I can’t stream season two? I hate you Amazon!

Also? I may or may not have recently realized that I have become Aidan Turner’s twin with this hair cut. Or at least his hot older sister.

No, I think that merits its own post entirely. Never mind.

So. Much. Yes.

This apple fritter is not bringing  me apple joy.

I’ve never had a joke fall flatter. Wow.

I hope something changes soon. Everyone is so grumpy this semester. It’s starting to wear on me.

I’m having a great deal of difficulty answering this question.

I hate to break it to you, but not everything is actually epic.

OK I don’t actually understand how LinkedIn works. I’m not even really sure why I’m there.

Wow. That is one of the odder things to happen to me in my professional life I guess.

“Gov Johnson might come, but that’s remote.” How bout we make it less remote? He really should make a stop here.

And just like that.

Wow, it’s all gloomy and doomy outside all of a sudden! Yay!

I’m not only happy when it rains, but I’m definitely happier.

What.

I don’t know. I guess I don’t have much to say at the moment.

Initiative is a really hard word to type.

“15 Most Evil Serial Killers”? Aren’t they all just, you know, EVIL? There are varying degrees of evil??

OMG YOU’RE SO GROSS.

Oh man. I forgot we had the donuts.

Hey Red! Poke PUBLISH.

I dunno. I could totally just go to sleep right now.

I love you, apple cider.

I guess I’m slightly less evil than some, but decidedly more evil than some others.

You know. Now that I think about it.

Nobody in my family gets food on their back!

Someone I admire messaged me to tell me she liked my damn hell bathrooms?! Day made.

Wow, these kids are loud. L.O.U.D.

loud

I have no idea what I’m wearing tomorrow.

I have no idea what I’m doing right now.