First of all, there’s a hit song that is largely about talking to a girl on Snapchat. Secondly, it is stuck in my head. This world is kinda dumb.

This whole time, with this Presidential Scholar thing, I keep thinking that there’s probably someone who deserved it more than me.

“My thought has a voice and it burns my throat.”

You know. I just don’t like weddings.

Holy wow, stuff is heavy.

I’m reasonably certain that manual labor is not in my job description. Although it’s not like I couldn’t use the workout. Lord knows.

If you haven’t listened to this yet, stop depriving yourself.

I don’t actually find coloring particularly relaxing. And it tends to frustrate me because I always expect it to be more rewarding than it ever is.

This girl is more bad-ass than I’ll ever be.

I just don’t even understand LinkedIn. At all. And forget about searching for a job there.

“Meet the doll with nipples and a vagina.” Do I hafta??

Not only do I not know how to use that budgeting software, I don’t even have access to it.

I don’t want a headache today. Can someone please make it go away?

I’m such a slacker this morning. Yesterday wore me out.

“No wonder I’m trapped in a coffee version of a homeschooler as a stooge in our WOODS.” ~Jennifer Bot
“It’s so flipping time.” ~Jennifer Bot

Man I’m in a weird mood. Weeeird.

Yeah, I dunno. I think that just goes to show that I actually do know what I’m talking about.

Two two two mints in one except not at all.

I need to go find a sandwich.

Vincent D’Onofrio is looking pretty rough. Although he’s a perfect Kingpin. Wow.

“Waiting for one person to say ‘Hey, it seems that you maybe know your shit as politics go. Do you have any advice on who to vote for, or should I just go for whoever a bird flies up to?'”

Neat!

I find Ice Tea’s wife kind of terrifying.

Once again I find I have failed to find a photo.

Oops. Phone.

What is this 1 Country? I have absolutely no memory of liking that page.

Um. No. You’re a priest. You should know that he would make confession and you would take confession. Gah.

Shut up, basic facts are important in television shows.

For my fellow ‘Mats fans.

That whole honors luncheon thing is making me nervous. I don’t know anybody. I hope the food is more than just desserts.

Why yes, I am going to eat this tiny cookie.

OK, it’s entirely possible that I’m not even sure how many tiny cookies I just ate.

I never really thought that podcast thing was all that good to begin with.

You are not wrong. It’s a DILEMMA!

Donde esta la biblioteca?

Lost another follower on Instagram. Fine. I DON’T NEED YOU! Too many photos of me in the last 24 hours I suppose. Ha.

We should run away and join the circus. The CIRCUS OF AWESOME!!!

Ha. Right. I’m such an elitist now. With my brains and everything.

I hate that these damn modules are all locked so you can’t work ahead. It’s incredibly annoying. I have time to do the reading now. Let me do the reading now.

I don’t know how “you don’t like people” is really a diagnosis. I mean. Hell.

It’s looking grim for our heroine, kind readers. Grim indeed.

I need to go to bed and sleep for three years. Cept that’s ridiculous. Innit.

I would not have referred to myself as an anomaly.

Anomaly. Anonymous. Androgynous. Ambiguous. Ambidextrous. Asynchronous. Anachronous.

I’m only maybe one or two of those things.

But not one or tow.

I don’t even remember what I wrote in that thing.

I know the first thing I’m going to do after graduation. Well. Maybe the third or fourth thing. But somewhere in the top ten things. Finally make it through the A Line Skirt class on Craftsy so I can make some cute new skirts for myself.

Why is the floor all sticky?

These food things are too complicated. And also expensive.

I have no idea how to pronounce that.

Don’t dawdle!

Dawdle is such a weird word. I never even used that word before I had children.

Dawdle.

I’m always afraid to send a text to someone after they’ve involved me in a group text because I think that everyone who was in the group text will also get my text. Consider this a PSA against group texting. It causes me actual physical discomfort.

Shut up. I am not weird.

I’ve always hated the phrase “the creative process”. I also hate it when people refer to themselves as “a creative”. It’s not a noun.

I’m an anti-artist. I suppose. Or something.

The cat type ones are pretty cool. I can say that even though I hate cats.

Wait, what? Funeral strippers? That’s a thing?

Scattered.

I’d say it’s more like a Detroiter’s view of North America. Those of us on the west side of the state don’t give Detroit that much credit. Actually, we’re pretty sick of Detroit. But it’s funny anyway. The Up North part is pretty accurate though. As far as Michigan goes. Pretty much anything north of Big Rapids is “up north”.

Post an SP in an Ayn Rand t shirt, lose a follower. Ha. Maybe I should be surprised it was only one.

I’m love you anywya

Your coffee smells exactly like cat pee. I don’t know how you can even.

She said iterative.

Oh my God that’s Russell Crowe. I thought it was John Goodman.

My stomach is sad at you.

I would totally wear that sweater. Their kits are so spendy though.

I genuinely wish I had the time for something like this. I definitely have the land.

There’s something about What’s Eating Gilbert Grape. I love that movie. I loved the book, but this is one of those rare instances when the movie was better than the book. I don’t know. I love it.

I completely forgot I’m supposed to be practicing walking in those damn heels.

Oh how cool. I love how differently kids view the world. I was always handing a camera to Miss W wanting her to take pictures, which she’s never been super into. I just love that perspective though.

Wow.

She really does not like tables.

I’ve wasted entirely too much time on this decision.

Gaslit.

Came across this gem from 2011: “My overseas contingency operations have resulted in man caused disasters which aggravate my kinetic military action, thereby negating any headway on pulling any cars out of ditches. It’s just a shame my odyssey dawn will be forever marred by secession of seven of the states. I can only blame Bush.”

I have to figure out where to take my sorry arse for lunch now. That makes me sad.

Today is one of those days that I really miss smoking.

I don’t know what to tell you. You probably shouldn’t have waited until the deadline to make the request. Other people beat you to it. Suck it up. Move on. That’s life. Etc. So forth.

Really. An entire class could be taught on when it is and is not appropriate to REPLY ALL.

I was not supposed to be this busy today. I was supposed to be able to leave early today.

Wow, maybe I should post this Friday. Maybe it’ll have some substance if I post it Friday.

“The US was “founded” by brown men and women, eons before white men stumbled upon the country by mistake.” … I weep for our nation.

Ooooh!

This has been a profoundly bad day. That’s all there is to it.

Y’all just make me tired.

And I just realized I’m hungry.

Great. I’m hungry and tired. That’s never a good combination.

Oh my. The airs you put on for your public.

I really need to get on that pet snail thing.

Ha. I love the cover on the new issue of Reason.

I’m glad these lazy chickens are laying again. All it took was me buying a dozen eggs from the store.

“10 things to hate about Sanders’ economic policy” Only 10?

You’re all I got tonight.

I really can’t remember the last time I washed my hair.

They switched my custodial crew again. I have no idea who these people are.

I’m glad I remembered to bring my umbrella in with me.

I wonder if the people who run the Visit Scotland Instagram account have taken notice of the weird jentober girl from America’s High Five liking pretty much every single one of their posts.

Every time someone I hear someone say “Livin’ the dream” I think of Sturgill Simpson now. I don’t gotta do a Goddamn thing ‘cept sit around and wait to die.

“Maybe that’s what I’m doing wrong. Maybe I need to become a functioning alcoholic.”
“Dude, it has worked for generations and generations of people.”

I dunno. Would it have killed you to say “thank you”?

Um. There are no alligators in Africa, dude. Africa has crocodiles.

This paper on bereavement practices in the Caribbean is very poorly written.

I am not dressed for dealing with sewage.

I keep thinking it’s Tuesday. I’m super happy it’s not but it’s really really confusing.

Seems to me that if you do something stupid in a country notorious for its unduly harsh punishment, you’re just going to have to suck it up and deal with the consequences of your actions. I do not feel sorry for you.

I should never have come back from the necromancer’s office.

These women are kind of horrifying.  Those eyebrows and eyelashes. Gah.

Yes. The “least scary” is a good way to put it.

Putter Outer of Fires

It’s mad windy. Wind does big things.

I need a serious break right now. Holy. Hell.

That computer isn’t even two years old yet. It’s rarely used. How can the hard drive be dying already? Stupid cheap HPs.

Bereavement. From “reave”. To despoil, rob, or forcibly deprive.

Emergency Exit Only – Alarm will sound! “Will it really sound if we go out that door? Really??” “Yes, it will.” “Seriously?” I had to open the door to prove it. I bet I’ll be hearing that sound a lot in the coming week or so.

Well no wonder I get along so well with engineers.

I think I’ll have waffles for dinner. I think that’s a good plan.

I wish I had a head for math, so I could talk to you.

There’s no way the Senate will confirm the cryer.

And I’m sorry, but what the hell is it with grown ass men crying all over Washington anyway? You need to knock that shit off.

“You’re pretty equally right brained and left brained.”
“Well, I’ve always said I was half human and half Vulcan.”

I need to find a picture.

Maybe I should do something involving the politics of death as a career.

Maybe I should get an MBA. Do I have to take the GRE for that?

I’m dreading the GRE.

I need to stop thinking about the GRE.

What? Well I am kind of a loner.

I probably should not have had waffles for dinner.

Hey! I washed my hair!

I always forget how much I love my 50mm til I start using it again.

Impromptu Cars dance party with Stormageddon!

Oh you know, just hangin’ out in the book manger. Like you do.

That thing is like half bat, half cat, 100% pissed off.

What the hell happened to the Phoblographer’s newsletter? ALL of the photos are super pixelated now. It’s awful.

I need a very large glass of water.

I’d rather go straight home than straight there. But there we are.

I’m generally not a fan of the memoir genre.

Just watching slugs eat chalk in a meandering fashion. Zen.

I need a snail zen garden.

I wish you could see who “loved” a post you made on Ravelry.

Yeah, you used “bloviated” incorrectly. Just thought you’d like to know. Bloviated is a verb, not an adjective.

Huh. I guess my first impression of you was, in fact, the correct one. Shoulda stuck with it, I guess.

devil’s right there, right there

Huh. I am a factotum.

Voted. Crossed another person off the People Who Need Shawls Knitted for Them List. Woke up at midnight thirty to Stormageddon vomiting on my chest. Brakes seized up on the truck. Haven’t managed to accomplish a single thing on the list of things I had planned to accomplish because I actually need to accomplish them thus far this week. Stupid staycation. Might as well have just gone to work.

At least I finished that sweater. I got that goin’ for me.

I need to face the reality that I’m never going to be able to get a new camera. And move on with my life.

If washing machines and trucks and all of it quit breaking, I can buy a used one. Probably.

The light in the geekery sucks. I am too old to be able to read in these conditions. sigh.

I’m a big ball of fun.

Well, technically it is true.

Oh it’s a monkey! I thought it was a cat. An incredibly dexterous cat.

Ooooh! Intrigued!

I’m not driving on those roads again! I don’t care! I’m not doing it!

Why yes, tea sounds lovely. Thank you.

thank you thank you

I can’t help it. I’m tired of winter. I need spring. I don’t even really like spring, but I’ll take it. I can’t stand any more snow.

You see what happens when you come into work an hour late, jentober? It throws absolutely everything off.

I need to figure out this whole sweater design thing because I have an unbelievably good idea.

I know it may come as a shock but …

let the devil in

Hey man. I’m just trying to stay out of your way.

It was just a suggestion, but I think people are going to prefer it that way.

Huh. The sound on my machine is not working. Bother.

Ohhh that’s who that is. I do not care for that song at all.

I’m not sure there’s really any coming back from that.

I think I like the concept better than the reality.

It’s in all those letters I never sent.

i think they’re on to me

I have completely forgotten what I was about to say.

The thing about a book is that there wouldn’t be any links. But that might make it more randomly odd and interesting.

I wish I had a donut.

My ass doesn’t wish I had a donut.

owwwwwwwwwwwww stupid shoulder.

That’s just your infernal clock talking.

Sometimes being a document hoarder totally pays off.

I need to get photos of those three projects up on Ravelry. Well. Four really.

High of 67 on Wednesday?! I’ll take it!!

Oops. Spoke too soon!

Well. But. This notebook has all my stickers on it though. There’re like eleventy I Voted! stickers in it.

Man I wish I had a standing desk.

Now I just want to laminate all the things!!!

All this sun makes it so warm in here.

Why is food always so problematic? Why? WHY?

Stupid food.

I don’t think I could be a death investigator.

Yeah, I don’t think I can afford the state shoot.

I have so much reading to do. I have a case brief to write. I have a paper to write. I have so much to do.

Blowing up balloons makes me dizzy.

Oops. That one popped. It hurt my ear.

It does seem odd that death investigators aren’t regulated, that there’s no accreditation requirement. Of all the things not to regulate, that seems like kind of an important one. The findings of a death investigation can have some pretty serious consequences.

No, Bristol Palin didn’t actually say that. Come on, people.

Oy with the balloons already.

It’s all very specifically nonspecific.

Very.

Gah. Facebook. I just can’t with you lately.

Maybe it’s the muscle relaxer talking. Stupid shoulder.

I’m still debating this waistband. Rip it out and re-knit or let it go? Can’t decide. Maybe I need to wear it for a day or something.

Well at least I’ll never be rich enough to warrant kidnapping.

I love this Knit Picks interchangeable needle pouch. I’m only sorry I waited so long to get it.

It’s the only way to be sure.

But. But. Surely it will work HERE. It’s not socialism socialism. It’s democratic socialism! But but but.

This Happy Valley show is alright. I do love those British mysteries. I’m so annoyed with Netflix for only having the first 4 episodes of Hinterland. I mean how does it end, man. How does it end???

I need to solve my food problem. But. Later.

Another old photo. Trying to make myself laugh today.

Hell’s bells, this is brilliant.

Stop calling me Jen. You are not my friend.

That whole sequence with Mulder and the line dancing and all of it? So much to love.

“You’re fathoming the disconnect.”
“And it hurts my brainnsssssssssssssss.”

I like this story. What a good guy.

What? The little tiny sign said “please drink me!” with a smiley face, so I did. It was so polite.

Stay being the best!

IT’S A TRAP!

IT’S A TROPE!

“It’s like you’re working at an abusive husband.”

Well I guess the winter storm has started.

I wish my shoulder wasn’t mysteriously wonked. Because ow.

Oh my GOD. How is License to Ill 30 years old? HOW AM I THAT OLD??

Two post cards from Africa! Yay!

Post cards make me happy.

“Gaslighting or gas-lighting is a form of mental abuse in which information is twisted or spun, selectively omitted to favor the abuser, or false information is presented with the intent of making victims doubt their own memory, perception, and sanity.”

Stupid washing machine.

I’m so sorry if I bothered you.

I would very much like to go to Scotland someday.

I hope my phone works tomorrow. Coverage gets weird when I go north.

Ooh! The capitol building has free wi-fi. By which I mean taxpayer funded wi-fi.

I wish job postings listed what the pay was.

What a horrible day. I’m trying to say, no, it’s OK. I’m breathing, and that’s something. But it’s just a horrible day.

The blizzard ruined my hair.

letters i never sent

What does this taste like? It’s weird. I don’t even know.

Oooh the like button is all weird now.

I’m not going to win. I had zero expectations of winning. And I’m going to try really hard not to be disappointed anyway when I don’t win.

I stopped regularly using Twitter several years ago. It was too easy to be a jerk. But it sucks that Twitter is taking this course of action. I hope my boyfriend Adam Baldwin comes to Facebook instead.

OK, I think I’m already not a fan of the new Facebook “reactions.”

My trip to the capitol is not looking good …

And just like that, it’s canceled. Oh well.

I’m still breathing. I’M STILL BREATHING.

Guess I don’t need to haul these protein bars with me then.

I need to finish listening to this lecture on death systems.

She said comedians talk about slaying the audience and I thought she said Canadians.

I should quit the internet.

but this tomato loves you

No, seriously. Ow. ow ow ow ow owo.owowowo.ow. Ow.

Horse in a bookcase. It’s a horse in a bookcase.

I really just want waffles for dinner.

I need to read some cases. Whee.

OMG stay out of the drawers!

“I don’t believe that guy. I think he did. Just maybe not so fast.”

So cool!

“I don’t like it when people are sad. Especially animals.”

She’s eating the waffles for me. What a sacrifice.

pushy pushy pushy

But my gauge is right on!

Bah. My tea has gone cold.

Where the hell is my row counter?

It’s not like we’ve had a snow day yet this year.

It’s not like I didn’t tell you.

Ah the hell with it. I’m throwing in the towel. Again. I’m going to go finish that episode of Jessica Jones.

Sounded just like someone opening a window.

I don’t have a photo for you this week so I pulled an old favorite self portrait from the Random Confederacy series.

Wow, that was such a great series. I hadn’t looked at those in quite a while. We did good, the Redhead and I.

You know what? Absolutely everything is making me tired right now. I am tired of all the things.

I have to admit, this made me feel better about my life. I work full time, I go to school halftime, I have two kids and a husband, I have to study, I travel around 80 minutes per day. Yeah, my house is less than magazine worthy. If you’ll excuse me I’m going to go cry and also collapse from exhaustion now.

Someone asked me the other day, “Why are you sleep deprived.” And that’s pretty much why I just cannot with the people.

I really like this lady. She gets bonus points for being a Michigander. She’s just. I don’t know. I like her. Check out her blog. Her Instagram is great too.

How did I miss all that cool stuff when I was in Baltimore?

HA!

Not buying those booties. Not doing it. I don’t care how cute they are. Saving money. Gah. I need an inheritance.

Gah. All the way through Chuck for the second time and depressed all over again that it’s gone.

Yep, that pretty much sums it up.

anonymous potato

Oops. OOPS. Oh oops. Saying oops makes absolutely everything completely OK. Oops.

The phrase “paranoia will destroy ya” is on loop in my skull at the moment but my brain has changed paranoia to perestroika. Yeah, I don’t even know.

What? This tiny bag of ranch flavored Doritos isn’t going to eat itself.

Yeah, you have to throw that whole Strengths Finder deal in with this nonsense too. I’ve complained about the ridiculousness of Strengths Finder before. Yet many departments on this campus use it. They require that you put your 4 or 5 or whatever it is strengths in your email signature. There is a company in Texas – Rackspace – that appears to be entirely built around this concept. They put your strengths on your name tags, you’re assigned to teams based on them, they have classes and counseling for them. It’s like a freaky cult.

This made me think of my friend Dock, and also want to shred stuff. All the things. Just throw all the things in the shredder. Right now.

Wearing contacts for the first time in two weeks. It’s remarkable how much I can’t see.

I’m trying to work on this paper, but I just realized I’ve been sitting here, staring at this Beanie Baby rooster, for the last five minutes.

What the hell is it with college kids? Their phones are glued to their hands but do you think they’ll respond to a damn email?

Not apologizing. Just acknowledging.

That does not sound delicious.

PROOFREAD    P R O O F R E A D   PROOFREAD

I need a t shirt that says “Save my sanity – P R O O F R E A D.”

I was not really impressed with Lady Gaga’s tribute. Sorry.

I feel like I stepped off the path of enlightenment and into some serious negativity.

Sorry. Writing a paper on Buddhist death practices. I’ll be fine. Really.

Why can’t a movie just be a movie? Why do you have to analyze it do death?

How long have you worked here? Right. So how is it that you think you can tell me how to do my job??

Oh wait. Bad karma again. Shrug it off. Breathe. Move on. Move on dot org!

The Marxist was really nice to me but her office smelled weird and now my pants smell like her office.

I had no idea the FCC did not regulate basic cable. I wonder why it took them so long to drop an F bomb.

But I don’t want to watch your video. Why can’t I just read what you’re trying to say?

Ha! Brilliant!

This sums up the life of every con I know:
My student staff to me: “I don’t like conservatives.”
Me: “You don’t seem to have a problem with me.”
Student, caught totally off guard: “Well. Uh. You’re OK. [pause] I don’t like conservatives who have to tell me their opinion all the time.”
Me, smiling: “Conservatives feel the same way about liberals.”

I for real just forgot my zip code and started writing down the zip code of my hometown. I haven’t lived there in more than twenty years.

I’m sorry, but I think it’s lame that Obama plans to skip Scalia’s funeral. That’s just disrespectful.

Guys. Kanye is kicking my ass. Kanye. Come on. Surely I’m a better human than Kanye? Surely? The comments on that Kanye fundraiser are pretty funny though.

Gah. Now I have to wash these pants. They’re sooooo stinky. It’s bizarre. And icky.

The people in this office sure do a lot of standing around and talking.

Think about the cockroaches for just a minute.

Maybe I’ll just go get certified as a welder after I graduate. I’m bound to make more money as a welder than anything else I might do. Plus I already know the basics.

all i ever longed for

I’m just babbling.

I’m only ever –

So wait. Are there going to be more seasons of New X Files after this??

OK my hair is genuinely gross right now.

I feel oddly calm and prepared for this exam. IT’S A TRAP!

Well. I think that was a pretty good twelfth birthday haul.

Twelfth is such a weird word. Very Tolkien-esque.

It’s like freaking Hoth out there. Nearly fell on my ass three times walking from my car to my office.

Why do people have to overcomplicate every damn thing? “Are my glasses in yet?” “Nope!” See how easy that was? But no, it has to be all “Well I know your tray has been pulled mmkay? And so we get shipments in when they come in and we pull and make sure everything is OK and then we call the patient and so I know your tray has been pulled mmmkay?” Gah.

Yoga ball chairs are the very best for desk chair dancing, just in case you were looking for tips.

If I were good at doodling beyond stick figures I’d do one of those calendar thingies too. But that’s not really how I roll.

i don’t have the drugs to sort it out

“You make her sound so disingenuous … like an Eagles’ song.”

I need to start doing yoga again.

I need to magically find the time to start doing yoga again.

What if I’m not really dead?

The idea of someone keeping watch over the body is comforting to me, as though someone were still there, holding your hand while you made your way to whatever came next. It makes death seem less lonely.

I’m reasonably certain that this year is trying to kill me.

I keep having this thought that after the last meeting of my last class I’ll go home and just sleep for three days straight. I won’t even be able to help it. I am already picturing the skull crushing headache that kind of sleep would induce.

“Where can I rent a guillotine?”

Tater Tot Nachos? Just no.

Now they want to take away my Macbook. Whatever.

quaaludier

I met this guy my freshman year at Michigan State. We were at a Tori Amos concert at the State Theatre in Kalamazoo. He was a student at Western. He sent me one mix tape a week for a whole semester. It was so freaking awesome. The guy was a total ass, gothic passive aggressive douche to the extreme, but he was a really good artist and had interesting taste in music. He’d decorate the covers with his drawings. Nothing will ever beat a mix tape with a well thought out cover. Nick Hornby hit it right on the head in High Fidelity when he described the process of creating a mix tape and the message you send with it.

Plus a package every week in the mail. Talk about happy. I love mail. Well. Not bills and junk. Happy mail.

Yacht rock: “The soothing sounds of the dying gasps of the Carter Administration.”

The phrase “human family” weirds me out.

Ooooh this chunky highland cowl is so cozy! It’s totally keeping me warm today. Y’all should buy one from me for your sweeties.

But I only have one Instagram account.

Dammit. I should have gone to Hobby Lobby yesterday. This weather is the suck.

I need buttons and yarn. Buttons and yarn. Buttons and yarn. Buttons and yarn. And a chauffeur.

Victory! I get to keep my Macbook!

We’re keeping the hope alive, my friends.

Democratic Socialists are against “greedy” people. Seems a little greedy to me to demand that those who work hard for the money they’ve earned share that money with others who maybe didn’t work quite as hard or at all. Democratic Socialists are amusing and tiresome all at the same time.

Hey, I just schedule shit.

I can’t tell if they’ve been out there for the last 4 hours continuously shoveling or if they just keep coming back. It will not stop snowing.

This is really cool.

Screw it, I’ll go to Hobby Lobby tomorrow.

Aw but dammit. It’s suddenly sunny and clear. Stupid Wednesday work crap interfering with my lunch. I need to face facts. I’m going to lose my parking space. ARGH.

I had no idea that there was still a winter storm warning. It’s all sunny out and the snow stopped. Funny.

That’s enough talk about that.

can i get an amen?

I think copying me on that was rather redundant.

What the hell is all over my pants?

Holy wow, I’m about to fall asleep.

I just. I can’t believe that’s someone’s real name.

I hope you all eat meat!

Cannot stop yawning.

My brain is cooked.

Ooooh chai latte!

I should never have done the whole eggplant thing.

ILU Ravelry.

That is not at all good for your hearing.

Yeesh!

It isn’t Random Cell Phone Picture Day.

I don’t know about the new X Files. Middle aged Mulder always looks constipated.

Well that was a weird phone problem.

I hate this phone.

Yep. This is the mom body I am inhabiting today. Whee.

My truck does not like to switch back and forth from 4 wheel drive unless I’m stationary. The Jeep was realy good about switching as long as I wasn’t accelerating when I did it.

I miss the Jeep.

You must always operate under the assumption that there will be no snow day!

I regret the chai.

I like my “trust no one” face.

I need spring to get here. I’ve reached that point in the season where I just do not even know what to wear anymore.

I did not even realize I was sliding into a foul mood, and yet here I find myself.

Guess that means goodnight.

I am very likely a lunatic for turning it down. But it feels like the right decision.

I read that as “art is a form of competitive prayer.” It was contemplative, but competitive made total sense to me.

Dude. It’s not “right of passage”. It’s “rite of passage.” Rite. Come on.

Also it’s propitiating. Not propitating.

i can’t carry the weight of this war

Don’t ruin a surprise gift of something by telling the recipient how little it cost you.

Neeeeeeeds it.

I’m never going to make it through this semester. Thus far, on one topic: Interned instead of interred (by everyone who has referenced it). Alter instead of altar. Extant instead of extent.

Death by homophones. This class is literally going to kill me with bad grammar.

what’s the use of bein’ bad

Oy with the poodles already.

I just like saying raison d’etre.

I carry post card stamps with me. Perhaps I’ve mentioned that I love post cards.

I still love this bracelet.

Wait. What? Who responds to an auto-reply email?

Hmmm. Kinda like Random. But more visual. And with more sexy stuff.

My socks were redacted.

they always let you down when you need ’em

His Instagram feed is like a David Lynch film.

Huh. Gryffindor. Not what I expected.

It’s pouring rain and I left my umbrella ella ella in the car ar ar.

OMG just stop. Just stop already. Stop.

Also I’ve never been able to listen to that song all the way through.

I totally thought that was a bag of croutons.

I haven’t been to Chicago in a couple of years. This will be a fun field trip. Maybe. Possibly.

I like her outfit. She’s all Steampunk Grandma or something. I would totally wear that coat.

Let’s face it. I’d probably wear the whole outfit.

unsubscribe unsubscribe unsubscribe unsubscribe unsubscribe unsubscribe unsubscribe

Wow, that was surprisingly difficult to type.

You should check out my friend Dock’s Youtube channel. He posts some fun stuff. Plus he’s just about the nicest guy you’ll ever meet.

I miss the 9th Doctor.

Crop tops are kind of terrifying. We maybe should have left those in the 90s.

They founded a fort in Fort St. Joseph? I think they founded a fort in Niles and it was called Fort St. Joseph. But whatever.

Holy wow, is that the sun??

I hope my glasses hurry up and come in. I’m excited to have my old frames back.

I think I’m at a standstill.

Dammit Rand! Dammit!

That unfriending your family during the election cycle thing was meant to be a joke.

I ran out of lunches in my cubby.

Me: “I have this nightmare that it’s going to come down to Donald Trump and Bernie Sanders in the general election. And what the hell am I supposed to do with a choice like that?”
A: “Killing spree.”

HA!

There is some music on my iPod that seems to have embedded itself there. When I look at what’s on the iPod in iTunes, it doesn’t show up so I can’t delete it. It’s incredibly frustrating. I am going to have to do a total wipe and see if that works.

They all look like babies to me anyway.

everything means everything

There are an awful lot of words in my head these days.

You talk entirely too much. I’m sure you have a job to do.

This is a spectacularly tedious task and my arm keeps falling asleep. I need a better desk chair.

I may or may not be chair dancing at my desk right now …

Actually. What I really need is a standing desk. Then I can just straight up dance at my desk and also my arm would not be falling asleep right now. And also I’d feel less blobbish. Probably.

I have to say, though, that with as tedious as this is, this is exactly how I love a work day to go. No one bothers me and I can block out the world with my earbuds and loud music. Brings back fond memories of being locked in the darkroom all day.

no one’s

“It’s in my peripheral village!”
“Your peripheral village??”
“I wonder what lives there. Probably all of the things you see out of the corner of your eye.”

I need to clean my guns.

There is just too much to do.

Any rational human can see that these two men are raving idiots.

The problem with skinny jeans is twofold: 1) You have to keep your legs shaved. 2) Men wear them.

I think you call them “beta males.”

Dammit. My leg is asleep. The whole entire leg is asleep.

I really probably ought to be doing some studying right now but I’m just fried.

I need new fun vinyl stickers for the Macbook. I’m bored with Ron Swanson and cowboy on a T-Rex.

now would be a good time for some grenades, don’t ya think?

Here’s one. Then everyone will see it during staff meetings. Ha.

Tiny Oreos ILU!

Apparently Stormageddon did not appreciate that issue of Reason. He has torn it to bits. And maybe some pieces.

Don’t get me wrong. It’s not like I enjoy walking around with hairy legs. I just maybe don’t feel like shaving every single day.

Must knit through the stash. Must knit through the stash. Must knit through the stash.

Must go work on Miss W’s birthday sweater.

Must go find just one more tiny Oreo.

Must must must

must

must

I totally forgot that it’s Wednesday. Ha.

Stop signing your work emails with “Best”. It comes across as insincere.

Evidently We Are Knitters is the American Wool and the Gang with slightly less annoying emails.

I like this idea.

Sunday I listened to this for 3 hours and 38 minutes while I studied. It both eased the pain of my weekend migraine and helped me focus on my reading. Best white noise ever. Thank you, Amanda. I love you dearly.

“… mere meddlesome interferences with the rights of the individual, and they are not saved from condemnation by the claim that they are passed in the exercise of the police power …”

Yeah, I have to say, I’ve been disappointed with the X Files so far.

I don’t know. I think this might be the busiest semester ever.

I don’t know why that’s so surprising to people all the time.

Things are sparse today. Sparse indeed.

These are beautiful humans, right here.

Politics is making me tired today, man. Tired.

I’m pretty sure that that was satire.

I think that’s 17 hours, not 17 minutes. I think.

Stormageddon. Stop drawing on my laptop. Stop drawing in my Constitutional Law book. Stop drawing on your face. And that snake is not a whip.

There is something wrong with this contact lens.

Nope. Still don’t understand Google+.

I cannot stand the characters in this book. They’re horrible people. I hate the anti-capitalist message that it’s beating me over the head with. I hate the future teen slang. I hate this book. Every once in a while, though, the author has written the most beautiful sentence and I want to keep them. I just want to put those sentences in my pocket and carry them around with me. “Hope was looking off to the side, as if someone she missed was calling her name.”

They should change the name of these tiny Oreos to Crack. Because that is what they are.

I can’t decide if I want to go to D.C. or not. Weirdest dilemma ever.

It probably would have been a good idea to bring the damn charger home with me. Don’t know what I was thinking.

I really think I might almost rather do the Lansing trip.

I still don’t understand what happened to those emails.

Kids and their nap squandering. They have no idea how good they have it.

The section on reproductive freedom is just way too long.

I keep forgetting what day it is. It’s weird having a day off in the middle of the week. Throws everything off.

Miles and miles of tiny stockinette stitches. I am ready for this project to be done.

deceive, inveigle, obfuscate

But I don’t wanna take the GRE.

Stupid standardized testing.

I have to finish dealing with my hair.