nobody here but us chickens

Random Wednesday Turkey Edition

Lucky you, more Trekkie me!

I refuse to get sick, dammit. I don’t care if my throat feels like tiny clawed things are building bonfires and having a party.

I do not understand people who don’t see a problem with TSA.

I can’t decide what to listen to.

Turkey generally bores me. Unless I make it. Which I never get to do. Why? Is my family afraid of juicy flavorful fowl?

I’m starting to suspect they turned the heat off on us a day early. It’s effing freezing in this office.

Four days off. Four days off. Four days off with pumpkin bread.

Scooby Dooby Doo. Where are you?

I hate the mall.

I think I’m going to go with Chris Isaak.

No, I’m fairly certain that you were not “omitted into” anything, brain trust.

Why is it so freaking loud in here? It’s not a party. Go do something. And you. You don’t even work here any more, move along.

The Heritage Foundation has it right. “Stop treating everyone as an equal threat.”

I would very much like to take a nap now.

I’m pretty sure that this evening’s cheesecake preparations will include a nice big glass of Scotch.

This might be the longest I have ever made a mug of tea last.

I’m so glad I’m not conflicted about anything. I can’t stand the drama. #bclc

Seeing your boyfriend’s children every other weekend really doesn’t constitute “raising” them by any stretch of the imagination. Get a grip. #bclc

Why didn’t I take today off?

Do they offer lessons in being able to block sounds? With the power of your enormous brain?

I don’t want that to be my superpower.

Oh, new web based mail program, how I loathe every character of code that went into your creation. You are less than useless.

Lovely lovely quiet. For a minute. Sigh.

Suddenly I’m starving.

I do not like tomato soup. Grilled cheeses taste just fine without tomato soup, thank you.

So cold. So sleepy. I bet it’s a plot to euthanize us. Or something.

My throat is feeling better.

Kind of.

I just don’t understand deep fried turkey.

I am thankful for many things. Among them is the fact that I get to eat lunch now.

Your incessant cheeriness and constant affirmation of the people you interact with on the interwebs are starting to severely grate on my nerves.


I am not greedy, jerkface.

Dude, your “I’m so thankful” list is reading like an Oscar acceptance speech. The only thing missing is the Academy.

I’m thankful for this iced tea I’m about to consume.

I’m having one of those “I think I’ll just quit the internet entirely” days.

I should be an advice columnist.

It is true that I have never actually read the Hitchhiker’s Guide. And frankly, I don’t really have any interest in doing so.

I suspect that tomorrow I’m really going to miss smoking.

Again, I implore you, learn the difference between then and than. It’s not hard, honest.

Don’t worry, I won’t break into the Bee Gees … right now.

Yes, brother mine, I do have a platter for the turkey. What kind of woman do you think I am?

Love Is Blue never fails to creep me out.

Boycotting TSA is easy when you can’t afford to fly anyway.

Switchies? Really? How old are you?

I’m thankful it’s close enough to 5:00 that I can call it a day.

In all seriousness, my faithful readers …

Have a safe and happy Thanksgiving!


1 Comment

  1. laura jean

    Your incessant cheeriness and constant affirmation of the people you interact with on the interwebs are starting to severely grate on my nerves.


    btw, my anti-comment bot word verification for this post is "thwomed". I kinda like it.

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