It’s generally not actually a conspiracy theory.

The past tense of sleepwalk is absolutely not slept walked.

Huh. I think I imagined that entire exchange.

Publishers Clearing House is still a thing?

I’m a secret Luddite.

See? It’s not that I’m a picky eater, it’s that I’m a Supertaster, and these foods are actually disgusting to me. I can’t control that. STOP JUDGING ME.

I thought of something when I was lying in bed last night that I wanted to put in Random and now I can’t remember what it was.

I know I’ve read this before. I’ve possibly shared this before. But this just feels like me.

That leg just looks … odd.

No one wants to talk to me. Fine.

Why are these British people talking about miles instead of kilometers?

I should be fine by then.

This is the first time since Obama was elected that my insurance premiums have gone down instead of up.

“grotesque manifestation of self-congratulatory debauchery

I need this shirt and I cannot find it anywhere.

Is that like fist bump?

purgatory maybe

God I hate Ravelry. But it’s the easiest place to keep my patterns.

Gnome, gnome on the range.

I wish this stupid floater would get off my eyeball.

Dear students everywhere. Your major should not actually be capitalized. Stop doing it.

Great. The woman who sells candles called “This Smells Like My Vagina” is now being held aloft as a champion of natural hair color. No fucking thank you. Get off our bandwagon, you loon.

Also? Her dress was a hideous mess.

What. Evidently this semester I take study breaks to be catty.

Also I was here first.

OK I’m done. Probably.

Order Post Its.

Not Post Toasties.

I had not intended to spend my entire day reading statistics. It’s exactly as fun as it sounds.

Is it bad that I just want to start The Mentalist over at the beginning even though I just watched the whole thing?

So I guess the answer is just squat more then?

It is straight up bullshit that you’re making me use FMLA for this. What a waste of fucking time.

the surprising science behind

Huh. I never thought about scents being extinct.

I have less than no interest in that.

well i hear you’re drivin’ someone else’s car now

Well, it seemed like a reasonable question to me.

“Ready to level up your working knowledge of math?” Absolutely not.

Of course she didn’t answer my question.

It’s a collection. Of sorts.

I don’t know who just came in here using rose scented shit but you’re about to die. Holy fuck. That hurts.

It’s not actually a musical instrument.

My mood is rapidly failing. Perhaps I should