nobody here but us chickens

Random Wednesday

wm7900Oh Matt Frewer was in Lawnmower Man II. I must not have seen the first one.

What’s up with the violin? I must have watched this. I have no memory of it though.

No. I will not get a flu shot. The only time I have ever had the flu was after I got a flu shot. So stop pestering me.

What the hell? No one wants to go to dinner with me and a best selling author? You don’t even have to pay!

Yeah, I wouldn’t even buy a Banksy for $60.00.

I feel like this should be a public service announcement: “It is almost NEVER necessary to reply all.”

Sweetheart. You can barely do your own job. Stop trying to do mine.

Here’s another PSA for you: Either spill it or STFU. Vaguebooking only irritates everyone around you.

You should stop putting apostrophes after numerals. It’s plural, not possessive. You’re in your 30s. You cannot possibly be in your 30’s.

I like the blue one. Too bad it’s so expensive. That’s my very favorite movie.

Chocula is saving my life right now. You don’t even know.

This is to inform you that you are a winner.

“democratization of banality”

el oh el

Chips and salsa. I love you.

where is it where is it where is it

A gloomy, misty fall day in the Mitten.

Oh good! Dinner takers!

So you want to be the associate dean, eh? Mwah-ha-ha-ha-ha

Hmm. Maybe it was someone else who agreed with me.

This really creeped me out.

I have no focus lately. I hate that. I hate it massively.

oompa loompa doopity do

i’m just a poor

I love this weather. I do I do I do

I do not love this semester. I wish I had taken it off.

I don’t think this generation understands what the word “mandatory” means.

Gah! Stop putting mayonnaise on everything!!!

Bill Watterson!

I’m very irritable right now. It’s best if I just read this crap and lay low. Very low. Maybe take a nap.

Listened to this on the cold, rainy walk back from class. Perfection.

I think I need a hiatus.

I never watched that show.

I’m feeling very cynical about all of it right now. Every last word.

Yes I did steal the Pride & Prejudice flyer. They should have known better than to use the new pulp fiction cover. It’s now hanging in my office.

That is my very favorite book of all time.

I don’t think I sound like a tool for saying “I don’t go to Starbucks.” Because I don’t go to Starbucks. For a variety of legitimate reasons.

Good Lord.

I can’t possibly be the only woman on this earth who hasn’t read that Fifty Shades of Nonsense.

Hubba Bubba Bubble Gum

Yes, please, thank you.

You’re quite welcome. welcome welcome welcome.

I need a door.

Ladies. Your problem isn’t Maria Kang, it’s that Maria Kang busts her ass to look like she does and you don’t. You feel guilty, so you turn that into being pissed off at some woman you’d never heard of before five minutes ago. Either STFU and start working on yourself, or ignore it. But being pissed off at a woman for the way she looks or her stupid caption on her photo? You perpetuate the much much much larger problem. Stop attacking each other for being successful, for working hard to look good. She’s not “shaming” you (and GOD am I so thoroughly sick of that turn of phrase – “fat shaming” “thin shaming” “what the fuck ever shaming”). You choose to be offended. So knock it off.

I want the bed, and the bathtub, and the nook, and the slide, and the library chair, and the southern nook …

That strange woman keeps emailing me.

Catastrophic Consequences!!!!

Yes, it’s cold. It’s not cold enough to turn on the heat. Maybe an electric blanket. Of course I don’t have an electric blanket.

Spectacular. Obamacare is ensuring that I will never be able to leave my job for something I like better because I can’t afford to lose this insurance. Sometimes it’s really damn hard not to just hate the hell out of all Democrats all the damn time. And don’t try to be all “I’m not a Democrat!” If you vote Democrat, you are guilty, and I’m trying really hard not to hate you.

Itchiest. Ever.

Seems like maybe I might have deserved a thank you for all the hard work I did for my event. But let’s just ignore me and thank EVERYONE ELSE FOR ALL THE SHIT THEY DO.

Um yeah. No.

Anthropologists are an interesting bunch.

Why does that keep coming up?

Plain M&Ms almost always make me happy.

Oooh! Amazon gift card! Maybe I can get something off my wish list!

What’s up with the aliens??

i swear this world

A giant Harlowe horse!

Got milk?


1 Comment

  1. ScottO

    What a coincidence! (No such thing.) You mention the Oompa Loompa song on Wednesday, and someone at work on Thursday resembles one!

    Also, thank you for the nostalgia of Hubba Bubba. When I was in high school, it was the only bubble gum that didn’t stick to my mustache!

    Second-best use of milk EVAH! (Cake is the best.)

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