Oh. My. God. It’s like someone sat down in my head for like a minute and said, “Oh yes. I know precisely the type of tea mugs you need. Indeed, I know just the thing.” And then created this. Just for me. If ever I needed a thing, this is that thing.

this is my

Oh right. It’s the return of the weekly meetings. Whee.

OFFS

I don’t know what the hell I sat in or where I sat in it, but I’m grateful that I am not wearing white and that it came out of my dress pretty easily.

Half of a half peeled potato.

“Peter Frampton is the first person I ever unfriended on Facebook.”

Gah. There’s not much worse than ice cubes that taste like whatever food has been in the freezer for the last ten years.

“That’s the deal. They buy me cigarettes, I buy them ice cream.”

I feel like I’m waiting for something to happen.

This just breaks my heart.

HA! My homeschool room might look that pristine and perfect for all of 5 minutes. Until my kids walked through the door. Keep dreaming, Buzzfeed. Also, do people actually have dedicated rooms for homeschooling?  Also some of those rooms are verging on the feel of a real classroom, which is something I’d say the majority of homeschoolers try to avoid.

I wish I had some pizza.

mistakes were made.

Where can I get some pizza?

I guess I’ll just eat this here bologna sammich.

I just can’t, with you. You make me tired.

Ha!

Anti-Capitalist Libertarians are not actually anti-capitalist? I just don’t know how you can call yourself a market anarchist anti-capitalist and then offer crap for sale.

Wouldn’t organized behavior be anti-anarchist? I haven’t read your book, I’m just wondering based on the title.

I don’t understand you anarcho-anti-capitalist types. I’m not a huge one for rules, and we all know how I feel about government intervention and regulation, but I do realize the need for very basic rules, which by their nature require a form of organization. I can’t see a world without civil society, and I can’t see how you can create civil society out of anarchism. And I can’t see a world without capitalism. Or I could. It was called the USSR. And we saw how well that worked out for everyone. I don’t know. I’d say convince me, but … I don’t think that’s possible.

Can someone just make one of these for me? I’ll pay you. You know. On account of I believe in capitalism.

I was not on a boat, down on the river.

I just work here.

Sorry. Michael Douglas is not a “hot dude.”

I do not understand you, LinkedIn.

These Reese’s Pieces must be old, because they do not taste like they should. I suppose that’s the Universe’s way of telling me I shouldn’t be eating this crap anyway.

Have I mentioned how much I really hate potlucks?

Wait. What even is a “libertarian socialist”? I mean how is such a thing even possible?

Apparently a bologna sammich is not enough food. Starvinggggggggggggggggggggg.

I can’t read this crap. I’m trying and I just can’t.

Dammit! These animal crackers don’t taste right either! They kind of taste like grass. And dirt. What the hell?

Alligator man isn’t real, y’all.

Huh. That’s kinda weird.

Sham! Scam! Baloney! Shambaloney! Shamone!

People get so worked up over libertarians. It’s hilarious.

I just don’t think a flipping email saying that class has been canceled is too much to ask.

I need a sanctuary city to escape all this societal lunacy.

Also I need to turn this air conditioning off.

Ha. Ha.                           Eggs.

Oooh! This Boneyard Shawl I made is sooooooooo cozy and warm. I think I might have to keep this one for myself.

“Who raised you???”
“You!”
“Surely not! My child would never speak to me this way.”
“It was you. You and dad. You did this to me. I’m the victim here!”
And yet she refuses to take drama class …

Boxed macaroni and cheese is about to not taste very good at all on account of they’re fixin to take all the taste good chemicals out of it.

I bet Nick Gillespie is reading this and saying “Don’t get me started on those anti-capitalists! Just don’t even get me started!”

Is that Leonard Cohen? I think it’s Leonard Cohen. Yes. It is Leonard Cohen. I like Leonard Cohen.

“Why does my phone want to autocorrect everything to ‘bat’?”
“Because you’re talking to jentober.”