I don’t keep track of that shit.

bless you

Did you butt text me?


WTF is Mark Hoppus?

Sometimes I wish there were a video aspect to Random so you could see my face right now.

I like being reminded which people not to let on the Compound in the event of the Apocalypse. “BAN ALL THE GUNS! But if there’s an Apocalypse I’m totally going to Jen’s house because she’ll protect us with all the guns and things.” Yeah, no. No I won’t. Good luck, and Godspeed.

I want to go to Canyon Falls.

This raises interesting questions for me, because isn’t it still a pig? Is a cloned animal not considered an animal? If we were to clone humans, would the clones not truly be human? Would they be soulless? So. Many. Questions. I’m going to be thinking about this for days.

letters I

Really can’t stand that Amelia chick Sam hooks up with in season 8.

I just watched a gif … do you watch gifs? I don’t KNOW. I … from Ilse of Dogs and I’m pretty sure I never want to see that movie because that dog weirded me out to my very core.

That boobage is all in how she’s leaning.

I am never going to make it.

WTF is with Spain and the cereal?

They were saying such nice things I had to look behind me to see if there was another Jen standing there.

Well, never mind. I have things to do other than talking to you anyway.

Charge the keyboard!

Reheat the dinner!

Batten the battery!

just kidding

Well, she’s young and hot. Of course they’re going to listen to her instead of me.

Well, really. What does any march accomplish? A whole lot of nothing.

You can’t bash that chick for wearing a Cuban flag patch. She’s Cuban American. It’s no different than me wearing a Norwegian flag on my shirt or whatever. Not a legitimate criticism.

So. Vero. Not really catching on.

I know what I need. I need one of those giant soft pretzels.

Someone made popcorn and I want to murder them.

(not gonna, police types. jesus.)

While I love a great deal about you, Google, I positively loathe the way you manage my photos.

I think my knee high black boots are outdated.

The news today is merely emotional poster children espousing wholly inaccurate and entirely anecdotal tales presented as fact. The media doesn’t care about truth, and they know you don’t either.

I should not have eaten that pretzel.


lowest of the low class

I don’t know why more people don’t find that Hogg kid creepy. I’m reasonably certain he has no soul.

This made me tear up a little. Thanks, Coop.

Ho.lee.shit. I want to go!!!

And now I need to visit this place. That’d be a good Saturday trip. Not too far to drive. Also it’d make a sweet house.

Who cares if anyone is looking at my LinkedIn profile? It’s not like it’s getting me any job offers or interview offers or whatever offers.


Shit. How the fuck did I manage that?

Maybe I won’t dye it. Maybe I’ll just leave it bare.

Knitting and hiking? Why yes, that does sound perfect. It also sounds entirely outside my budget. Stupid retreats.

The title alone makes me want to punch him in his perpetually smug face.

Wacky Wednesday

Oh too much. Right after I posted about this dick above, Coop sent me this link. I’m dying.

“repairs are underweigh”

I think I’ll just stop talking to people. Entirely.

e n t i r e l y

How do you stab someone for hours? How is there anything left to stab?

I won’t be discussing death practices with you today. I’m so sorry for your loss.